JAMES STRECKER: Your presentation is titled Music and Wellness, so, to begin, what do you want people to learn as a result of hearing you?
STEPHEN SITARSKI: Mostly I just want to start a discussion about mental health. It is still stigmatized and badly understood by most of society. In our ‘sound bite’ world it is all too easy to jump to convenient conclusions when interacting with someone who is suffering from one of these terrible conditions. It is good for everyone to learn how to engage with such a person: be patient, and ask simple, sincere questions.
JS: What parts of your talk were initially hard for you to discuss and why was that so?
SS: Every time I speak about my own illness, I relive the difficult moments of darkness, numbness, and hopelessness that I felt (and still feel on occasion).
JS: What exactly is the connection between wellness and music?
SS: There is now enough research to prove that: 1. Music education for children is one of the best things for their healthy development, perhaps even the MOST important thing they can do, 2. Listening to music engages a different part of the brain, so that dementia or Alzheimer patients experience soothing effects, 3. Humans attach memories and feelings to pieces of music to the extent that they conjure up pleasant nostalgia. This can be used therapeutically.
JS: What connection is there between the quality of music people in a society listen to and that society’s wellness as you define it?
SS: Music can be pretty subjective, and there are changing trends all the time. Cultural and generational gaps can lead to misunderstandings or even a complete lack of understanding among members of society. I suppose that whatever musical sounds a person or group find meaningful will be healthy to them. And if anyone is denied music important to them there will be great anxiety.
JS: You talk of wellness and I wonder how you might describe ‘unwellness’ and also describe how unwellness impacts on society
SS: Wellness to me represents a state of physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual balance. Therefore, unwellness is the imbalance of this state. A lack of physical fitness, strong personal relationships, challenging work, and/or existential calm is being unwell. An unwell society is less generous, less empathetic, and more prone to unhealthy decisions.
JS: What have you learned about people from the questions your audiences ask you during your presentations?
SS: I truly believe that society is turning a corner in regards to mental health issues. Most people (it would seem) that attend my presentations know someone (including themselves in some cases) who suffers from a mental illness. We don’t hide this as much anymore.
JS: During your presentation you talk of your own depression. What do you want people to do in dealing with their own depression and the depression of others?
SS: The most critical thing for a severely depressed person to know is that depression is an ILLNESS. It isn’t WHO you are or WHAT you can be. But…you must still reach out for help. This disease wants to isolate you, to denigrate you, to see the futility of everything and anything. Asking for help does NOT feel comfortable because the victim doesn’t think they deserve it, or just doesn’t care about their future at all. And if you notice someone shrinking socially, having poor self-esteem, becoming easily irritated, or withdrawn, please just ask them if they are ‘okay’. And if they’re not, seek help for this person.
JS: What is there about a profession musician’s life that is most difficult to handle and what are the harmful effects on a musician’s wellness?
SS: Different stages of different musicians’ lives bring about different stressors. Nevertheless, a musician’s ego is extremely important. What we do is so difficult on a daily basis that the idea that we’re doing a decent job in performance is critical. Praise from others is fairly important, but even more so is our personal satisfaction of playing up to a perceived standard of excellence. Battling perfectionism, or not reaching a high enough level can be crippling for a musician’s psyche. Lack of authenticity is also a factor. If we aren’t regularly performing music in a way that satisfies our inner feelings, we will suffer. When enough of these stressors build up over time, our body will release such a huge amount of cortisol that our immune system will become confused and begins to attack our own body.
JS: Please discuss three pieces of music that have a healing effect on you.
SS: Kancheli: Exil, Chopin mazurkas, Beethoven string quartet op.130
JS: Please describe what having depression feels like.
SS: It can have at least two faces. The first is a toxic level of low self-esteem that leads to self-harm. The other is nihilism – nothing matters, there is no joy, no hope, no future.
JS: What remedies have helped you with your depression?
SS: I have taken standard antidepressants (SSRIs), had psychotherapy, and changed diet. I am now managing my depression primarily with cannabis products.
JS: Please describe the ideal doctor.
SS: One that can spend enough focused time with a patient to not just provide a diagnosis, but to also discover why the illness may have occurred. Also, s/he will be someone who considers non chemical alternatives, if possible.
JS: What advice would you give a young person who wants to be a musician?
SS: Be aware of the many stressors throughout every stage of your development and career. You can’t avoid most of them, but if you know what the challenges are you can stay in control. BE AUTHENTIC. Listen to how you feel. Remember that the voice that you hear speaking in your head is not necessarily you. YOU are who is listening; therefore, you can filter that information and use only that which is helpful and positive. And finally, LIVE an interesting life. Otherwise you won’t have much to say as an artist.
JS: How should sponsors arrange for you to come do your presentation?
SS: I can be contacted through my website. www.stephensitarski.com
JS: I have to ask…the first live concert I ever heard as a kid was Scheherazade with Sir Ernest MacMillan conducting the TSO, and I was transformed, so what does it feel like to play the solo violin part of Scheherazade, which your HPO will be performing in the spring of 2020 with you as violin soloist?
SS: This is one of the greatest pleasures of being concertmaster in an orchestra. Rimsky-Korsakov has given the solo violin so many opportunities throughout this piece to express many different characters. I have performed the solos several times, but I am really looking forward to performing it in Hamilton with Gemma conducting. And don’t forget – there are incredible solo moments for so many other instruments as well…