JAMES STRECKER: Please tell us about one or more projects that you have been working on or have recently completed.
DIANA STUDENBERG The two most recent projects that I’ve been a part of that have had releases are:
– The rock band I’m in, Trope. Trope is a 4-piece alternative rock band with progressive elements and we’ve completed recording our debut album ‘Eleutheromania’. We just released our cover version of the Tears for Fears song ‘Shout’ and will be releasing more music in the coming months.
– I co-wrote a song called ‘I Choose’ performed by Alessia Cara in the new Netflix animated feature ‘The Willoughbys’.
JS: How did doing these projects change you as a person and as a creator?
DS: Trope changed me as a person for many reasons. The music itself changed me a lot, in providing a vehicle to express some really challenging emotions from experiences that I’d been holding onto, in some cases, for years. I didn’t find that therapy helped as much as actually writing about it. What I didn’t realize is that being in Trope would also accrue some of its own intense challenges. It’s definitely been a crazy journey, but, ultimately, I’m extremely grateful for it. I’m thankful every day that I get to sing in Trope. It’s completely changed me as a creator because it’s the most challenging thing I’ve ever worked on, and just taught me the value of crafting and just doing the work, no matter how long it takes, or how many tries.
2- Working on the Willoughbys’ song with incredible songwriters and getting to see how they do their thing was really something. And outside of the song, actually being included in the early scratch days, vocalizing in the booth, working on characters and just being around so many people in animation really expanded my mind. It was amazing and humbling to observe that ecosystem. And also see just how much work goes into creating an animated feature. It introduced me into a new passion for voice acting, which is an art form I was never really familiar with, but also gave me perspective on how I approach my band actually. Many of the people who worked on this from the creative to the distribution side have so much experience, that it was just a fortunate situation to be able to listen to those conversations and try to soak up as much information as possible on the creative process, to distribution, marketing, sound mixing, storytelling etc.
JS: What are the most important parts of yourself that you put into your work?
DS: I’m not sure… I think the most important part of myself is my care for the work. In tandem with that I think is just being as honest and exploratory as possible. I think writing about things that really stir me up intensely does more service to work too, because if it’s something I personally feel is worth saying, it’ll just come out better in the sense of, a more cohesive and laser sharp emotionally clear piece of music. I’m extremely fortunate to get to write to such vast, complex and layered instrumentals.
JS: What are your biggest challenges as a creative person?
DS: I tend to overthink things… my brain is very active and ping pongs a lot. It looks for alternatives, patterns, solutions, problems, possibilities. You name it, I’m thinking about it :)! That makes it challenging at times to write the Trope stuff, because sometimes I see an infinite amount of possibilities. Getting in the right headspace of exploration, freedom, response, presentness, intention takes work for me. Once I zone in and understand what I want to say, it’s a bit easier. I’ve been getting better at just shutting off the voices, but it’s still a work in progress.
JS: Imagine that you are meeting two or three people, living or dead, whom you admire because of their work in your form of artistic expression. What would you say to them and what would they say to you?
DS: Oh. I’d love to meet Jeff Buckley. And actually, Kurt Cobain, and David Bowie. I would thank them for their incredible artistic, heart and soul contribution to the planet and ask them about the creative process. What inspires them? Were they hard on themselves? And in my dream-world, maybe they’d tell me [in a British accent of course] ‘it’s all be okay babe, the essence exists around you already and you don’t gotta overthink it, have fun, connect and most of all love. love matters, it’s worth it, most people try to shut it out, but they yearn for it. It’s what keeps this whole ball of dust going. hey here’s a drink, you could stand to drink a bit more, you’re a bit stiff, ya can’t bring what you’re holding onto to the next life y’know, loosen up a bit… is that moustache hair on your upper lip? Don’t worry love, at the end of the day… it’s all just rock n’ roll.’
JS: Please describe at least one major turning point in your life that helped to make you who you are as a creative artist.
DS: Meeting my producer Moonhead was I think the biggest turning point for me as an artist. His mentorship taught me so much. Fields of knowledge… on the creative process, artistry, honesty. I’m extremely grateful I get to work with such a talented, experienced and committed human being. Other than that, really the other largest contributors have been a flurry of very challenging situations sprinkled with abuse lol… seriously though, nothing screams ‘evolve’ louder than pain.
JS: What are the hardest things for an outsider to understand about your life as a person in the arts?
DS: This is great question after another :). Honestly – the focus. I suffer already from severe ADHD, I make lists to remember stuff and this career path is so all consuming. It consumes your mind, your time, your sanity. It’s probably extremely unhealthy to be so obsessed. But I just don’t think things get made and shipped unless there’s this intense energy and focus and work put into it. Also, the only certainty is in one’s ability to do the work. So, given that, all I can do to calm the voices in my head is work harder. Also – if I don’t play music for a few days because I’m in marketing or logistics mode, I become a mess. My thoughts darken, my whole alignment shifts, self-esteem drops, etc. I can’t speak for others, but I think I’m just ultimately not the mentally healthiest person, and I’m also not the kind of person to take my demons out on others, or revert to addictive substances, so I heavily rely on work and art to survive. I think that’s perhaps hard to understand when you’re maybe wired differently.
JS: Please tell us what you haven’t attempted as yet that you would like to do in the arts? Why the delay so far?
DS: Oh, there’s so much! I’d like to produce and act in a short film, write a solo album of progressive acoustic songs [more for myself than anything], and publish a poetry book.
I actually have started compiling some of my favorite poems and regarding the solo album… it’s something I’m more interested in doing down the road, maybe in 5 years from now. Right now, musically I’m loving writing the Trope stuff, and Divine Astronaut [which is another project I’m in that’s electronic alternative]. Regarding the short film… I really just need to invest more brain cells into coming up with a concept. I know I want to tell a story, I’m just not sure what that is yet. Like anything else… I just need to do the work and throw some paint on that blank page.
JS: If you could re-live your life in the arts, how would you change it and why?
DS: Oh my… that’s a loaded question for me. It’s loaded because it would have been nice to feel safer to explore and express my true self more freely from a younger age… and/or known how to deal with an environment of judgment. I think that kills creativity. Fear can really suppress the spirit, if at a young age you don’t know how to fight against it and even worse – if you’re in denial of being affected. And I really just didn’t know how to. And I’m still teaching myself. I think ultimately, everyone learns differently. I’ve had a lot of learning via judgment and tough-love, and on the one hand that’s helped me undo some patterns or shocked me out of them as well actually. But there are dangerous by-products of that too. If, in my experience, the self-esteem gets too low [like plummeting], it makes it challenging to assimilate those lessons into love. And art is love. It’s creation. No amount of explaining that we must make it about the work, works when you’re just too low or an empty shell. Or it didn’t for me.
For me, love lifted me up. Seeds of hope really made all the difference. I wasn’t able to do that for myself as significantly at first. I stayed in it, and kept working, but for the first long stretch, things felt like a slog and very uphill because I was also trying hard to undo patterns and writing a lot. I really needed people who believed in me. I needed to cut out the people who were naysayers, abusive, and even those who don’t see me as an artist actually. And then I was able to see that I’m worth investing in. I mean we each are worth investing in. That’s when I was able to clear the space to work more intensely. I’ve always been an extremely hard worker, but there was so much murk, that I was spinning my wheels at first and wasn’t as effective as I am now.
So, to come full circle – I’m actually extremely grateful for all the windiness, and how challenging it’s been on different levels. I think I have things to write about because of this. It’s my journey, and honestly… there’ll always be things that maybe I wish were easier earlier, but for me, that’s not the stuff that fuels me as a writer. I also wouldn’t take it back because I love and admire the people I’ve met along the way. And who I get to collaborate with. I’ve built lifelong friendships with a small handful of people who are very special to me. In the end, I’m very fortunate I get to do this.
JS: In your creative life thus far, what have been the most helpful comments you have heard about your work?
DS: What’s helped me a lot was ‘That’s not good enough! What’s your intent? That’s generic garbage lol. It doesn’t matter what other people think, or if it’s ‘good’, write what you need to write about.’
JS: Finally, what do you yourself find to be the most intriguing and/or surprising things about you?
DS: My long-windedness is very surprising.
Thank you so much for this interview. Thanks for the thoughtful questions and sharing our music.